Are YOU A Freaky Mom?
How do I know? (duh. Moms know everything…remember?)
I know you’re a Freaky Mom, because if you ended up HERE…it’s not just happenstance.
You are the best Mom your kids could EVER have.
You love them with a passion.
You teach them manners.
You say “no”.
You mean “no”.
You crack up in hysterics with (and at) your kids…until tears run down your legs.
You reflect on your mothering.
You want to be the best Mom for your kids.
You’re a coffee connoisseur, because some days that’s how you survive.
You’re contemplating becoming a sommelier (for both wine and chocolate.)
You serve cereal for dinner some nights.
You ARE Me:
Before we moved from the big city, my two boys had been in the same Elementary School their whole lives. I knew their friends. I knew their friends’ parents. I knew where their friends lived.
When we moved to our small town in 2014, I didn’t know any of the friends, the friends’ parents or where the friends lived. Diego was in fifth grade, Andre in second.
I started from scratch.
Step One, Meet the Friends.
And that’s where the Freaky Mom Story begins.
In the fall of Diego’s sixth grade year, I went to parent-teacher conferences. I didn’t know where to go in the middle school and asked a girl in the hallway for directions. She pointed me toward the right classroom but before leaving, I said, “Do you know Diego?” She smiled and said yes. That was Sally.
Sometime later, I saw a kid about Diego’s age. I recognized him from school and waved. We’ll call him John.
Around the same time but at a soccer game, a girl I had seen with Diego was posing for a picture and I jumped in…the picture. Yes, I agree, that was kind of weird, but remember, I was on Step One, Meet The Friends. That was Erica.
A few days later, Diego and I were driving home from soccer practice.
We were on the long country road that leads to our house, about minute 20 of a 25 minute drive, it was pitch-dark, I was in the zone watching out for stray cattle (yes, that happens here in the country) and the car had been quiet for a good stretch.
Out of the blue, he blurted, “Mom. Today we were all sitting around the table talking about our moms and when it got to you like 14 of my friends said that you are freaky, creepy, weird…”
“Oh right,” because he is known to exaggerate, “Name ’em.”
Much to my amusement, he proceeded to count off on his fingers approximately 14 of his friends, describing my infraction for each.
Finger number one: “Sally said you’re freaky because you smiled at her.”
Finger two: “John said you’re creepy because you waved at him.”
Finger three: “Erica said you’re weird because you got in a picture with her.” (OK, I agree on that one. Photobomb by Freaky Mom you’ve never met. She’s got me there.)
…and on and on and on for 11 more.
I did some obligatory, “Whaaaat??” “No way!” “Give me a break!” But in that moment, I proudly donned the story as a badge of honor.
My kids’ friends will know who I am, I will know who they are and that’s just how it’s going to be.
At soccer practice a few days later, I was on a run with my new friend and fellow Mom, Emily. I recounted the details of the story and, after splitting a gut, she laughingly announced the inception of the Freaky Mom Club!
That was years ago and we have proudly referred to ourselves as Freaky Moms ever since.
Her son and husband printed “Freaky Mom Coach” t-shirts for us the first year we coached our boys’ basketball team, she emblazoned Freaky Mom Coach on the backs of our coaching t-shirts the next year.
My sons don’t call her Emily, they call her Freaky Mom.
When I call her boys, my name doesn’t show up on their phones, Freaky Mom does.
The name has now taken on a life of its own.
More friends have joined the club, we’ve laughed till we’ve cried telling the story and inducting new members, we have stickers with which to award random acts of Freaky Mom (once on the side of the road to a police officer…long story for another time), we even have a Freaky Mom gang sign and, at half time of a soccer game, began developing a Netflix series.
A book is in the works. (yep…really. I’ll let you know when it’s published.)
The Freaky Mom Club is a place to laugh till you pee, search to the bottom of your soul and realize you are not alone.
You are doing an awesome job and your kids will appreciate it when they’re older.
Sure, you make mistakes as a Mom. I do too. You aren’t perfect. Neither am I. But you’re doing your best.
Working on balance, love, consequences, rewards, carpools, not pulling your hair out, keeping food in the house, remembering to shave your legs and sometimes doing the laundry.
So, are YOU a Freaky Mom? Check out some sample behaviors below and then you decide.
You are a Freaky Mom if you (among a zillion other things):
1. Love your kids with a passion.
2. Scream the loudest at their soccer games. (They don’t play soccer? I still like you. Substitute drama, band, volleyball…)
3. Take their phones for bad grades.
4. Say no when you’re in line and they’re begging for candy at the store.
5. Expect the best.
6. Expect mistakes.
7. Reflect on your mothering style.
8. Are involved.
9. Embarrass them because you love them.
10. Know their friends.
(see??!!! I knew it! You ARE a Freaky Mom!!!)
That’s why it’s time you know about it. You can join the Freaky Mom Club too!
Be the kind of Freaky Mom your kids will appreciate when they’re older (because they sure don’t now.)
Good Job Mom,